Uncertainty and Books

I’m ready for life to stop being hard, because right now, I’m about tired of this uncertainty.  Currently, I’m experiencing uncertainty with my parents health, uncertainty with my fertility and journey to get pregnant, and uncertainty with my school situation.  Uncertainty requires faith, and my faith tank has been running dry lately. 

I don’t really want to write my sad story down, because I feel like I’ve been a downer the last few posts, so instead, I’ll highlight some good things.

I cleaned out my laundry room and garage.  Yep.  I did it.  I finally got myself off the couch and drew myself out of my pity party where I was watching far too many sad TV shows and movies and eating far too much Nutella straight from the jar.  This was a big deal.  Not only because I needed to physically do something, but because both spaces were frightful.  I was even able to give away some high quality things on my town’s Buy Nothing page.  Looking at these clean spaces and knowing my generosity maybe helped someone makes me feel good.  And I need to feel good right now.  Maybe I’ll just go hang out in my garage or laundry room… but probably not haha.

Look, it’s okay to feel sad.  It’s okay to absorb it into your bones and rest in your darkness.  But eventually, and you’ll know when, you have to step out of it, if only for a minute or an hour.  Eventually you’ll step out of it more and more.  Right now, I’m stepping out of it.  I don’t know for how long, but for right now, I am.

Now, let’s talk books.

High hopes.  I had such high hopes for my reads and quite frankly, I’m tired of wasting my time reading duds, which a lot of my reads this time were.  Even the ones I wouldn’t consider duds, were still not great.  I need a great books.

My first book this time was Separation Anxiety by Laura Zigman.  This book seemed quirky and fun and definitely caught my interest from the first page.  A woman straps her dog to her in a baby sling as a midlife crisis. Unfortunately, the narrator was highly unlikeable.  Not only that, but it was written in an active voice, which was especially jarring for me.  I kept waiting for the book to take off, but ultimately it was directionless.  The narrator is struggling with her child growing up and her marriage is failing.  But then there was irony and sarcasm, only it wasn’t actually funny, it was just the author trying too hard. 2/5.

The second miss of a book was What You Wish For by Katherine Center.  You’ve seen me rave about her work.  In fact, I loved her previous book How to Walk Away so much, that it was my most recent book giveaway!  Imagine my surprise to jump into her newest novel and really, really dislike it.  I picked it up at least three different times and just could not get into it.  Eventually, I got to reading and found the writing to be lazy.  Center used this shock factor to introduce one of the main characters by saying “the Duncan Carpenter” and “my Duncan Carpenter” multiple times within 5 pages.  I didn’t love this book.  Maybe one day I’ll pick it up and try again since I do love this author, but for now, I’ll just await her next work and hope she gets her groove back. 2/5 (which is being generous).

My third book was The Music Shop by Rachel Joyce.  As a music lover, I was very excited for this book that centered around a record shop owner who knew just what song his customers needed.  The cover alone is beautiful.  I know, I know, don’t judge a book by its cover.  This book initially reminded me of High Fidelity, but those vibes went away after a few chapters.  After Ilse, the love interest, was more prominently in the picture, the book fell flat.  There were a lot of words with not a lot of action.  The whole idea of the record shop owner knowing what each customer needed went away quickly and the story centered around a love story that wasn’t all that thrilling.  3/5.

Next up, I listened to The Dutch House by Ann Patchett.  I know I wouldn’t have continued this book if it weren’t for the magic of Tom Hanks and his peaceful voice.  The book certainly told a story, but it just wasn’t one I found all that entertaining.  I wanted more excitement and more going on.  The book centered upon Danny and follows him from boyhood to fatherhood.  Danny grows up in a beautiful stately home, to which the novel contemplates wealth and status and how quickly that can change.  Moreover, this book was about the bond between two siblings, Danny and his sister Maeve.  They needed each other and relied upon one and other at multiple points in their lives.  This book was a purposefully slow novel that focused on theme rather than an enticing story.  It was fine, but I love a juicy, un-put-down-able plot be it thriller or literary fiction.  If the story is going to be more meditative and slow, then I expect stellar, poetic language to keep me engaged, which this lacked. 3/5.

My last read this month was Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia.  I was mostly intrigued by this because of all of the buzz It was getting.  I’m not sure I would have picked this one up on my own.  This novel focuses on a young woman who goes to visit her sick cousin who had sent an alarming letter.  What followed was a House on Haunted Hill vibes horror story where the author was not afraid to go there.  By go there, I mean, she did not shy away from being descriptive to make the reader uncomfortable.  I was completely okay with this.  What I was not okay with was the slow build, however, I can respect the slow build.  She Morena-Garcia spent a long time building the atmosphere and characters, but it did make me want to give up early on.  3.5/5.

So there it is folks.  My very mediocre reads this go around.  I’m really hoping for some 4 and 5 star reads next time! I have high hopes for Night Swim and Luster, which were some of my BOTM picks for August!

Keep calm and read on!

Life Updates and My First 5 Star Read of the Year!

In my previous post, I wrote about my worry that my Morocco trip would be cancelled, and lo and behold, it was.  I’m not sure if it will be rescheduled or if I will go somewhere else or anywhere at all. There is real fear surrounding this virus and the World Health Organization officially declared it a pandemic, to which I’m like… why did it take this long? 

I can’t even buy Clorox wipes, which is comical, but at the same time, is this something we should fear? Should I be buying water and toilet paper and stocking up on food like the panic stricken Americans?  Or is everything being magnified and over exaggerated by the media?  While the news is now reporting over 120,000 cases worldwide, with over 1000 of those cases in the U.S., the news is neglecting to inform that of those 120,000 cases, almost 70,000 have been discharged or “recovered,” and almost 45,000 who currently have the virus, are seen as experiencing it “mildly.”  I think it matters how the world reacts, and right now it seems that the world is reacting in a big way.  It will be interesting to see how this all plays out in the coming months as we wait for a vaccine.  I just can’t believe I had a real fear of being quarantined.  It really makes you feel like you’re living in a dystopian novel.  Guess I won’t be reading Station Eleven any time soon. If you don’t know anything about that book, look it up and you’ll see why.

In other news, Spring Break is just around the corner and thank the good Lord Jesus, because these kids are driving me insane.  I had planned on having a sub next week, and having an extended spring break, but alas now I have to actually be present and do my job. Ughhh.  Luckily though, I’ll have (what will feel like) 2 weeks off.  The first week is half days, and the second week is sweet, sweet freedom.  I can almost taste it. 

Talking about spring, who really despises time change? Whether I’m springing forward or falling back, I cannot stand this body shift.  And it is a body shift.  I can’t seem to get tired until midnight, which is then causing me to sleep in.  The darkness doesn’t help either.  I was liking the fact that I was driving in with the sun in the morning, and now, it’s just bleak and dark and depressing.  I know I’ll eventually get used to it and that the sun will eventually join me again for my morning commute, but this week has been a struggle.

Enough about me, let’s talk books!

A Good Neighborhood by Therese Anne Fowler is my first 5 star read of the year, but it’s not for the faint of heart.  This book was told from an interesting point of view, but it didn’t put me off.  The plot was so perfectly pieced together, with the second half of the book really picking up steam.  I so strongly disliked one particular character and his selfish delusions that my reactions were somewhat visceral and if an author can create a character so vivid and unlikeable then kudos to them.  I wouldn’t say that this was an enjoyable book in that some parts were very tough to read.  However, I was completely pulled in by the drama that was unfolding and the overall themes in this novel are important and so well conceived throughout.  When I was thinking of how I would rate this book, I debated rating it a 4, because maybe it didn’t read as fast as some books or end happily, but then I was like, nope, this is a 5 star read. Matter of fact.  It just is. 5/5.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo wasn’t even on my radar until I read Daisy Jones and The SixDaisy Jones was one of my favorite books last year and while many loved Seven Husbands, it just didn’t do it for me.  The book was a quick read and the characters were likeable enough, but in a book so heavily reliant on the characters, I needed to like them more. The author, Taylor Jenkins Reid actually wrote and published The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo prior to her successful Daisy Jones, which I loved. Both books seem to have a commonality: they both tell the tale of a creative icon though an inventive format. I’m wondering what Reid will do next? Perhaps an artist?  I am excited to see what Reid comes up with. 3/5.

I listened to Uncommon Type by Tom Hanks, mostly because I knew Tom Hanks was the narrator of the audiobook and I wanted to listen to his comforting and soothing voice.  I so wanted to love his short stories, but I had waited this long to read his collection, because I had heard bad things.  Some stories were stronger than others and I even tried to validate his usage of older language like “yowza” and the phrase “hook, line, and sinker,” because it’s Tom Hanks and of course he would use that language.  Part of me even liked it, because it’s nostalgic and recalls a simpler, more charming time in our history.  A time, I often long for.  Unfortunately, too many of the stories just didn’t deliver.  Short stories really need to be beautifully written due to their conciseness.  Hanks just didn’t have that delivery.  I did really like a few of the stories though, and since this is his first effort, I’ll say it was a 3/5, but I’ll also say I’m being a little generous too.

My next book was The Two Lives of Lydia Bird by Josie Silver.  Some might remember this author from her wildly successful breakout novel, One Day in December, a book I actually hadn’t read, because I couldn’t get into it when I skimmed through it at the bookshop.  Regardless, everyone seemed to love that book. I had pretty high hopes for Lydia Bird based on the plot and thought maybe I was missing out when it came to her first book, but after reading Lydia Bird, I think there is just something I’m not connecting with regarding the author’s style.  The Two Lives of Lydia Bird was very meh to me.  Partly, the book was marketed as a love story, but in fact, it was actually more about the grieving process.  I think I was expecting something different than what I read. 3/5.

I’m looking forward to more books! Shortly, I’ll be reading Darling Rose Gold, a new thriller said to be spine tingling and twisted; In Five Years, a new book of friendship and love that is getting pretty solid reviews; and I’m thinking of checking out Sharks in the Time of Saviors, a magical realism book set in Hawaii that pushes into some Hawaiian legends.

That’s what’s been going on between the binding.  Happy reading y’all!